Strength of Will
by Esum Amla
Summary: Hyugacentric Hanabi is bending under the pressure to be the perfect heiress. When she activates a curse seal out of frustration and spite, Hanabi learns first hand that with great power comes greater accountability. Rated for strong language.


A/N: My knowledge of Naruto is based on the anime series not the manga. Therefore, any inaccurancies are strictly my fault. I like the Hyugas in all of their complex, dysfunctional splendor, especially Hinata whom I believe has a hidden strength that has yet to be tapped into. I plan on writing more stories like this one that revolve around the growth of her character and those who are directly impacted by it. In regards to the curse seal, my understanding of it is it is like an epiletic seizure. Therefore, I based the symptoms and treatment loosely on how one would respond in such an event.

Rating: PG for language

Disclaimer: Naruto is the property of Masashi Kishimoto.

Strength of Will

By Esum Amla

"How dare you!"

Hanabi glared at her cousin's back, her youthful pride insulted by her cousin's blatant disregard of her authority. Was she not a member of the Main House? And was he, a simple Branch member, obligated to serve her?

"I gave you a direct order, Hyuga Neji. You have no right to say 'no' to me."

Her elder cousin did not turn to face her but she could see the defiance in his rigid stance. His hands were clenched tightly into fists and the silence surrounding him held the energy of a summer storm. For the briefest of moments, Hanabi was afraid of him. But then her father's stern voice rang in her mind and she remembered that she was the heiress of the Hyuga clan and as such, she was to be strong and unyielding. She was to be obeyed.

The cousins stood in the courtyard; Neji facing the gate as he was in the process of leaving to join his teammates when the young heiress accosted him with her demands. Hanabi stood a few paces behind him waiting impatiently for her cousin to acquiesce.

There was a faint sigh. "As I have explained, Hanabi-sama," Neji's voice was eerily calm, "I cannot comply with your wishes because I have a prior engagement. If you would ask some-"

"I'm telling YOU! Do as I say." In Hanabi's mind, all she could think about was how disappointed her father would be if he were to witness her inability to assert her power over _**one**_, lowly branch member. She had worked so damn hard to please him. She was finally starting to see approval in her father's eyes when he looked at her and Neji had to mess things up and defy her; defy her so openly!

Neji did not turn around but he did tilt his head to the side and looked at Hanabi over his shoulder. His eyes were hard and his jaw was rigid with the effort to maintain the outward appearance of calm. Hanabi was aware of Neji's feelings about the Main House just as she was aware of her father teaching him the secret fighting techniques of the clan and the growing amity between him and Hinata. But at this moment, he was nothing but an insubordinate Branch to her.

"I will not say it again," she said tersely and she brought her right hand before her in a manner that was familiar to most Branch members.

She noted with satisfaction the very slight hitch in her cousin's breathe and the accelerated heartbeat born of anxiety despite Neji's impassive expression. '_He will learn before this day is over that I am not to be underestimated_,' she thought triumphantly.

He held her gaze for a moment longer and just when she thought she finally won the battle of wills, Neji turned resolutely and headed for the gate.

A red haze clouded her vision and before she realized what she was doing, her hand made the signs her father taught her that distinguished her as a member of the Main House.

She'd never activated a curse seal before but she had seen her father do it once so she had an idea of what to expect. She expected screaming and begging. She expected thrashing about fitfully and clutching and tearing at one's hair as the sufferer endured unimaginable pain. What she did _not_ expect was to see Neji crumple gracelessly to the ground, silent and unmoving.

Perplexed, she moved closer to investigate. Neji's body laid haphazardly as though tossed carelessly aside. The muscles of his body appeared locked in a never ending spasm and his eyes were wide and vacant as though in terror. His breathing was erratic and laborious as he struggled to inhale properly.

Hanabi frowned. She thought perhaps she did not do the signs correctly for Neji was not behaving as one whose curse seal was currently razing his brain. No screams. No begging. No thrashing about. But she had to admit, she found this particular reaction…mildly disturbing.

Ignoring a sudden wave of nausea, the young heiress deactivated the seal and watched as Neji gasped loudly, gulping on air as he curled into a pitiful fetal curl, pressing his hands tightly over the curse mark on his forehead.

Hanabi, for the longest moments, was speechless as she watched her cousin struggle to collect himself. He did not move from his position for the longest of times and his body appeared to shake miserably.

'_I had no choice. I had to assert my authority_,' she reasoned against her guilt.

Aloud, with the confidence and dignity taught by her father, she said, "Let this be a lesson to you, Neji-kun." With that, she turned and left the courtyard swiftly, unable to bear the sight of the suffering boy a moment longer.

* * *

She was peacefully asleep when a small, calloused hand woke her rudely with a firm shake of her shoulder. Startled and unsettled, she looked up to see her sister staring down at her with an unfamiliar look of suppressed anger on her face (for the wildest moment, she reminded Hanabi of Neji). She was still dressed in her ninja attire and it was the middle of the night. 

"Hinata?"

"Get up," her sister's quiet voice was sharp and brook no argument.

Unnerved by this rare display of assertiveness from her tentative sister, Hanabi quickly sat up. "What is it? What happened?" She started in surprise when her robe was flung unceremoniously at her, hitting her square in the face.

"Get up and follow me."

Her sister was acting so out of character that Hanabi thought it best to do as she was told. She followed Hinata out of her bedroom and down the hall. She had no idea where they were going and Hinata, facing forward, did not speak to her. It was not until they reached the Branch family section of the manor house did Hanabi become guarded.

"Father taught you how to activate the curse seal," Hinata spoke, staring straight ahead as she walked steadily to her destination.

Hanabi's eyes narrowed. "He did," her tone was unapologetic despite the apprehension she felt in the pit of her stomach. "It is my right, my destiny to know it and use it as I see fit."

"Hm," Hinata closed her eyes briefly in thought. "Perhaps it is, perhaps it isn't," she said flatly.

Hanabi sniffed indignantly, thinking Hinata had picked up too many of their cousin's mannerisms. "You know it is! And if this is about Neji, I have nothing to say. As a member of the Main House, I may assert my authority as I deem necessary. I need not explain my actions to him or to you."

Hinata stopped suddenly outside a door, her eyes closed and her face creased as though in pain. The disgraced heiress turned to face her sister for the first time and Hanabi was taken aback by the magnitude of sorrow conveyed in the opalescent eyes. She noted absently that Hinata was still dirty from her mission. Her jacket was torn and bloodied at the sleeve and she appeared completely exhausted. The mission must have been particularly difficult. Hinata needed rest, not a debate of family politics in the middle of the night.

"Why are we here?" Hanabi asked cautiously. She belatedly realized they were standing outside of Neji's room.

Hinata's face was impassive, save for a slight quirk of an eyebrow. "I thought you should see what your 'authority' has wrought," she said tonelessly as she slid open the door and stepped inside.

* * *

Hours later, Hanabi stumbled out of the room, catching herself against one of the support beams before staggering to a nearby bush where she proceeded to vomit.

* * *

Hanabi sat alone on the wooden stairs outside of Neji's room, her knees drawn up to her chest and her face buried in the fabric of her robe. She was trying valiantly to come to terms with what she just saw but it was difficult. She could still smell the sweat, the sick that permeated the room despite her efforts to clean up. She could still hear the disoriented, tearful pleas for a father long dead and her sister's soft, patient voice giving reassurance and light. She could still feel the heat radiating off her cousin's prone body as the fever took hold and then broke leaving him more exhausted and delirious. 

All her life, she knew Neji to be the strongest of the Hyuga clan and she secretly admired (and maybe envied) her cousin for his strength. But this night…this night he was all but broken.

And it was her fault.

The door behind her slid opened and without the need of the Byakugan Hanabi knew it was her sister. She felt her presence sit beside her but the young heiress could not bring herself to face her just yet.

"Here."

Hanabi slowly raised her head to see Hinata extending her water flagon towards her. She looked at her questioningly.

"I-I put some ginger extract in it," Hinata explained. "It'll help settle your stomach."

Nodding, the younger sister took the offered water and drank what she could. Her stomach protested mildly but she managed to keep it down. After a few moments, the queasiness began to subside. "Thank you," she said softly, looking down at the flagon in her hand.

"You're welcome."

The sisters sat quietly together, each lost in their own thoughts before Hanabi broke the silence. "Is…Is he going to be alright?"

Hinata closed her eyes and nodded. "He just needs rest. The first night is always the worst though he may have to cope with severe headaches for the next few days. Do not worry," the elder sister offered Hanabi a shy smile, "Neji has survived worse. He will be fine."

"You must hate me."

Hinata visibly started. "W-What? No, I could never hate you. You are my sister."

"I did this to him. I activated his seal." Hanabi rested her chin on her knees staring off into the distance, willing herself not to cry. "I had no idea it was like this. I had no idea the suffering lasted this long. Father didn't tell me…"

"Father probably does not know," Hinata admitted almost guiltily as she though she had just revealed the man's vital weakness. "I doubt most Main House members know the full extent of activating a curse seal. It's just…It's just not important to them."

'_Of course, we wouldn't_,' Hanabi thought in self loathing, '_We walk away so quickly as though we're the stronger ones_.'

She looked at her sister, suddenly recalling how at ease she was while dealing with Neji's plight. "How is it that you knew what to do for him?"

Hinata sighed and blushed minutely. "I attend to him whenever his seal is activated." When her sister looked at her with confusion in her eyes, the ninja elaborated. "When a Branch member's seal is activated, it takes a grievous toll on their mind and body. Their family members must take care of them until they fully recover. S-Since Neji's father died, he has had n-no one to do this for him." Hinata shrugged bashfully. "So I do it."

"And he allows this?" Hanabi asked incredulously, reasoning that although Neji's relations with the Main House have improved tremendously, his seething animosity was not **that** far in the past.

Hinata blushed deeply and out of habit began poking her fingers together. "It is not something we talk about. He is very sensitive about it. We merely have an understanding. Discretion guides us when and if this circumstance arises."

'_And compassion_,' Hanabi easily surmised. She knew she could not do what Hinata did for Neji. It is no wonder the two trust each other in their own, speculative way. She bowed her head in guilt. "Did he tell you it was me?"

"That is not Neji's way."

"Then how did you…"

"I ran into his teammates on my way back from my mission," Hinata explained. "They were concerned because he did not show up for training so I went in search of him when I returned home. I deduced your involvement from there."

Hanabi waited for her sister to explain further but when it was clear that Hinata would say no more on the matter, she frowned impatiently and rolled her eyes. "Fine, keep your secrets," she grumbled. "It matters not. Probably guessed," she muttered under her breath.

Hinata smiled faintly at her sister's childish pout but did not fall for the bait.

"So, what now? Do you want me to stop using the curse seal? Is this what this whole thing's about?"

Her sister looked at her briefly before averting her eyes. "I-I can't make that decision for you…"

"What the hell, Hinata!" Hanabi threw her hands up in exasperation. The girl's emotional endurance had reached its limit. "You wake me up in the middle of the night pissed off, drag me to Neji's room, made me clean up his vomit and watch him suffer and you tell me you can't make that decision for me!" She buried her head momentarily in her hands, growling in frustration. "I can't be like you. Father thinks you're weak because you're so nice and if I don't use the curse seal and master the Gentle Fist and act like the perfect Hyuga heiress he's going to give up on me just like he gave up on…"

She stopped herself but she'd already said too much. Hinata was silent with her eyes downcast and her shoulders slightly slumped. She looked so defeated and Hanabi, frustrated, guilt-ridden Hanabi, was responsible for that too. "Hinata, I'm sor-"

"Hanabi, I understand all too well the pressure you are under," Hinata began as though her sister did not speak. "It is not my intention to make things more difficult for you but…a leader should know the full extent of her actions."

She rose to her feet and Hanabi quickly followed, watching her sister closely. Hinata was once again the subdued, self effacing girl; the imposing warrior that woke her in her bedroom earlier that night was a distant memory.

Hanabi frowned and noted absently that she liked the warrior in Hinata despite the brief time she saw her.

"I should check on Neji," Hinata said quietly as she turned to head back into the room. "You should go get some sleep while you can."

"No, I can help you," Hanabi protested gently.

"There's nothing more you can do. Besides, Father likes early morning training sessions. You do not want to be tired for those, trust me." She opened the door but did not go in right away. "You're right, Hanabi."

"Huh," the younger sister quirked an eyebrow in confusion. "Right about what?"

Hinata sighed ever so softly as she walked inside the room, closing the door behind her. "You don't want to be like me."

* * *

Hanabi's body went through the movements of the Gentle Fist fighting style with the relative ease of one who had been practicing it for many months. It was indeed early morning and her father did indeed frown in disappointment when she'd yawned involuntarily while he gave instruction on proper positioning but it could not be helped. Despite returning to bed, she could not sleep; last night's revelations being foremost on her mind. 

The morning did not bring with it any clarity for the young heiress. She knew not where she stood regarding the use of the curse seal. Was it weakness not to assert control when necessary? Leaders, after all, must make difficult decisions everyday and it was only those who were strong of will that were capable of carrying out such difficulty for the sake of all. She understood that much from her father's teachings.

However…

She glanced up in time to see Hinata make her way tiredly from the Branch section of the manor. Hanabi realized then that her sister spent the entire night tending to Neji and was just now going to rest herself. Their father would have found Hinata's actions wasteful and irresponsible. She was no longer so certain.

As she watched her sister make her way towards her room, dirty and bloodied from her mission, tired but never once stumbling, Hanabi began to wonder if maybe her father gave up on his eldest daughter too soon.

The End

Reviews are welcome.


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